Lockdown Reflections on Grey
Waves of lines, white tides, rollers moving,
breaking on another shore, in another time,
waves rolling in silence, slow as mercury
silver shimmering, there is no sun in this sky
It is a panorama without feature, or horizon,
I can fix my gaze outward — it is fixed anyway,
Sunlight moves across the unmoving vista,
Unchangeable, while slow grey traffic passes.
The windows of people’s houses have the blinds drawn,
Now and then, I used to see someone look out from their window,
They never looked at me, they never waved, or made any sign,
I stopped seeing people, one day there was no one to see.
I used to see people walk past, old couples mostly,
They became fewer, sometimes ones, rarely twos,
The people walked very slowly. Walking so slowly,
It was like watching someone move in slow motion.
There are no people walking past – it becomes dark,
and the houses opposite don’t show their lights,
The supermarket truck used to deliver every week,
I’d see the same men, they’d ask how I am.
The deliveries changed to just once a fortnoight,
the drivers just leave the boxes outside the door.
A woman used to come out of her house and stand,
Waiting for the bus to go into town, she stopped
Standing at the bus stop. The bus stopped coming one day.
Something felt wrong, it was because the bus never came.
There were always ambulance sirens, blaring night and day,
Blue lights flashing, when they pass the house, they are gone.
I take no notice now. It is constant. They will stop one day.
Outside this house to take me and I will be gone too.
Where are the people who believed in miracles? Why are they quiet?
People in the concentration camps asked — Where is god?
They announced there are vaccinations coming for everyone,
They made it sound as if our scientists had performed a miracle,
they sounded like they believed a miracle had happened,
could a vacine be found for depression and mental health?